soliloquy

i must say that right now my emotions aren't stable. They seem to fluctuate in an alarming pace. The trajectory doesn't seem to have any rhythm at all. One time I'm ecstatic to plunge right in with one particular thing, another time Im oh so lost and scared like a frightened cat. Just thinking of this particular thing makes me so terribly out of my self. It seems weird though that after feeling so excited about it, my emotions revolves 360 degrees, upon realizing the many stumbling blocks that my path is filled of. Suddenly, Im stricken with fear and anxiety. Sometimes, that fear is greater than my will. That's quite inadmissible, knowing that I am a strong lass, and I am not to be intimidated by such thoughts alone.

Why do we allow ourselves to be defeated by our very own minds?

I just have to be faithful and be ever trusting to my dear self. That no matter what happens, I must take the plunge. I must taste it now or never. For in the future I don't want to dwell on regrets of the past. 

And that whatever my mind believes, I can always achieve. Its all in the mind. Beautiful is abstract. Success as well. 

I need to conquer my self, to keep my mind from generating fear.I must be able to control my mind. To achieve the abstract of beauty and success.